GOOD FENCES MAKE GOOD NEIGHBORS? OR IS IT WEEDS THAT BLOCK BUDDING FRIENDSHIPS?

Two days ago we had the remainder of our front yard Xeriscaped -- we had already partially committed last year but  had left the sides and curbway in grass.  I’m going on record that I’m not a fan of hard landscapes, but we really were at our breaking point, financially and emotionally.  Living next to a wetland pond, our grass gets invaded each year with mites.   If you add the mites to the good old Colorado wind and drought, along with those endearing little ground squirrels who like to tunnel  . . well . . . you get something resembling a chicken yard scratched in patches of dead grass and dirt.  Only we don’t have any chickens.

 Picture:  The pond is literally a hop, skip and jump from the side of our house

Picture:  This actually is a picture of our backyard and I’m still trying to save it from converting into hardscape.  The backyard has also suffered from lawn mites, wind, drought and ground squirrels.  I raked out the dead grass, laid down fresh dirt and mulch, and added Scotts Patchmaster.  Three weeks later little grass seedlings are finally starting to sprout.  Keeping fingers crossed.

So here we are with a true western garden in the front yard now, accompanied by boulders and miniature dry riverbeds interspersed with indigenous plants that thrive in an arid climate.  Years from now I suppose the front yard is going to look quite beautiful (in a dry, western sort of way) as the plants mature and extend their range.  Our water bill will go down significantly.  We won’t have to replace sod year after year.  And we won’t cringe after a winter remiss of snowfall that leads to watering restrictions.  These are tangible benefits, to be sure.  Still, I prefer the look of soft grassy carpet bordered with overgrown ferns, soft pink azaleas, and purple wisteria.  Time to pinch myself because that’s me dreaming that I live in New England.  Here, one must learn to appreciate the pale beauty of faded yarrows and cornflowers dressed in purple floppy hats. 

Picture:  One of two dry river beds in our front yard

Picture:  Yarrow -- a sturdy pioneer plant that does not shrivel from harsh ultra rays and lack of water.  This one is about 8 years old and she's from our backyard as the front yard yarrows are very much in their infancy.

Picture:  Cornflowers in my front and back gardens, also known as that healing plant Echinacea.  Cornflowers definitely do well in Colorado.

So what does any of this have to do with fencing and neighbors?  Well, as we were developing the plans for Xeriscaping, the HOA sent us one of those really delightful letters that every homeowner wants to receive.  You know the one:  in a roundabout prim and proper way, basically telling you that you are becoming pond scum to the neighborhood.  Our letter read something like this:  “Your front yard looks distressed and you have 16 days to remedy the situation.”  Mike was annoyed – really annoyed -- given we had tried to bring the lawn back with seed and fertilizer to no avail (the front yard just wasn't responding as well as the backyard and I suspect it had to do with sun location and water restrictions -- we're only permitted to soak the lawn twice a week).  And we were already working with a landscaper to draw up plans for Xeriscaping when we got that lovely letter in the post.  I love my husband but he is a suspicious one and so was convinced a neighbor called the HOA to complain.  I’m convinced almost every house around the pond received a similar letter given all of our yards seem to have that “distressed” look.  I mean, we don’t have the corner market on mites around here. 

At any rate, we got on it, received HOA approval of the plans, and hired the landscaper.  After the job was completed yesterday, I went outside to soak in the new look of hard landscaping. 

Picture:  front view of our fully committed western landscape

Picture:  Pathway to the backyard adds variation to hardscaping – framed by Russian Sage.  Truthfully, we've had this pathway for years now but it looks more complete with the front fully hardscaped.

All appeared fine until I gazed at the next door neighbor’s bordering rock bed.  Filled with weeds.  Ugh.  I mean, really filled with weeds, some of which were at least 12 inches tall.  Somehow I missed this eyesore when it butted up against our own patches of dirt and dead grass.  I’m guessing the HOA missed it for the same reason.  It’s rather the same phenomena that occurs when you don’t notice how shabby the carpeting is until you’ve finished painting the dining room wall.   I had some choices, including calling the HOA to complain.  Instead, I got down on my knees and started pulling.  In an hour, I successfully removed every weed along their rock bed that butted up against our own and voilà – the eye sore was gone.   And not a bit of poison used.  So the shared border now looks fine, but the rest of our new neighbor’s yard is in need of some major maintenance.  The previous owners would no doubt be appalled to see what has happened since they sold their house.  Our neighbor has lawn mites too, but it’s more about not pulling the weeds or the Aspen saplings that sprout up in the middle of their yard, or filling in bare spaces with more rock. 

Picture:  the infamous shared border, now devoid of weeds.

 Picture:  same neighbor, but these weeds are on the shared border of the other side of their house.  Note to self:  pull your weeds so you don’t end up on someone’s public blog.

Still, I hold off calling the HOA.  After all, the last two years I’ve had overgrown grass in my garden beds and dead plants littered throughout.  Cancer grew in my backyard and maybe it does in theirs too.

Robert Frost said it best in his poem, Mending Wall:

And on a day we meet to walk the line
And set the wall between us once again.
We keep the wall between us as we go.
To each the boulders that have fallen to each.

I’m resolved to keep pulling the bordering weeds – the equivalence of those boulders that have fallen to each -- and hope that these neighbors are not in the middle of their own Time of Great Neglect.  They are new to the neighborhood and I don’t know them well enough to ask and don’t want to intrude.  But whether a crisis is brewing in their lives or not they’ll eventually get one of those lovely HOA letters.  Right or wrong, it won’t be because of me.